 |
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
|
|
|
|
 |
 |
Accountant Jokes |
|
How do make jokes about accountants when they have the most boring job on the planet. Laws of Accounting 1. Trial balances don't 2. Bank reconciliations never do 3. Working Capital does not 4. Return on Investments never will Who was the first accountant? Adam. He got interested in figures, turned the first leaf, made the first entry, lost interest after withdrawal, buggered up the monthly accounts and raised the first liability. What's a shy and retiring accountant? An accountant who is half a million shy and that's why he's retiring. A businessman tells his friend that his company is looking for a new accountant. His friend asks, "Didn't your company hire a new accountant a few weeks ago?" The businessman replies, "That's the accountant we're looking for." A businessman hires a private detective to find a missing accountant. The detective tells him that he needs a description and asks a few questions. "Was he tall or was he short?" The businessman replies, "Both!" How do you know when an accountant's on holidays? He doesn't wear a tie to work and comes in after 8.30. What would Economics be without assumptions? Accounting What does CPA stand for? Can't Produce Anything What does FCPA stand for? Finally Caught Pinching the Assets Why did the auditor cross the road? Because he looked in the file and that's what they did last year. Why did he cross back? So he could charge the client for travel expenses. How many auditors does it take to change a light bulb? How many did it take last year? How many cost accountants does it take to change a light bulb? Hmmm........I'll just do a few numbers and get back to you What does it mean when an accountant is drooling out of both sides of his mouth? His desk is level How do you know accountants have no imagination? They named a firm PricewaterhouseCoopers. There are three kinds of accountants in the world. Those who can count and those who can't. What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet? Lost How can you tell when the Chief Accountant is getting soft? When he actually listens to Marketing before saying No When do accountants laugh out loud? When somebody asks for a raise Why do accountants get excited on Saturdays? They can wear casual clothes to work
|
 |
Copyright © 2024 Luckytool, LLC. All rights reserved. Lots of Jokes™ is a trademark of Luckytool, LLC. Contents is protected by international copyright laws. Unauthorized copying or duplication in any form is strictly prohibited without the prior written consent of Luckytool, LLC. Use of Lots of Jokes acknowledges your acceptance to our terms and conditions, DMCA notice and privacy policy. |
