CNN Drinking Game

This sensational game, unlike some other television drinking games, is guaranteed to get you absolutely and completely shit faced drunk in under an hour. So gather your friends around the TV, because its time to finally get up to date with world events and get fucking plastered at the same time, its CNN drinking game time!!! Yeeee haaaaa!

CNN DRINKING GAME INSTRUCTIONS

Number of Players
2 to 10 (having more than 10 really puts a strain on the local ambulance supply)

What Is Needed
1 pair of dice; lots of beer; lots of booze; 1 king can of beer or booze.

How to Play
Tune into CNN. Each time you hear or see one of the keywords listed below, drink the corresponding amount and type of alcohol. The first one convulsing on the floor with twitching legs and flailing arms, wins!

Using the Keywords Table
The "If you hear..." column means any time you hear an announcer, news person, an interviewer or interviewee saying the keyword. "If you read..." means any time you see the keyword on that annoying ticker at the bottom the screen, in a title or elsewhere on the screen during a news broadcast.

Qualifying Beverages
Booze refers to gin, vodka, Bacardi, bourbon, rum, no panty waist coolers or ciders. Beer refers to real beer that is 4.5% or above. Skull is defined as to complete a full standard sized container or glass of beer. Sip is defined as the typical amount you would drink each time you are usually taking a hit of beer, "nursing it" sips are not permitted.

Disqualification
Players who dribble beer out the sides of their pie holes when skulling are disqualified. Any attempts to water down or lessen the alcoholic content of a shot or beer is deemed pathetic and that player is disqualified.

Bonus Play
If you hear any three or more of the keywords in a single sentence (example "Members of the Iraq terrorist regime have assembled weapons of mass destruction aimed at Michael Jackson's ranch.") means all players must role pair of dice once; player with highest number must skull king can of beer or booze.

NOTE! This game is ONLY in fun, and is only trying to point out HOW MANY BLOODY TIMES we hear the same words OVER and OVER and OVER again, day after day after day on CNN. It is NOT intended to make light of any of the situations surrounding the actual news items themselves.

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