Online computer users often engage in
what is affectionately known as "Cybersex". Often the
fantasies typed into keyboards and shared through Internet phone
lines get pretty raunchy. However, as you'll see below, one of the
two cyber-surfers in the following transcript of an online chat
doesn't seem to quite get the point of Cybersex. Then again, maybe
he does....
Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and
high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My
measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?
Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses
and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from
Wal-Mart. I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue
sauce on it from dinner. It's smells funny.
Sweetheart: I want you! Would you like to screw me?
Wellhung: OK
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing
on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table. I'm looking
up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your
crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse. My hands are
trembling.
Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off
slowly.
Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure. The cool
silk slides off my warm skin. I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling
and rubbing.
Wellhung: My hands suddenly jerks spastically and
accidentally rips a hole in your blouse. I'm sorry.
Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
Wellhung: I'll pay for it.
Sweetheart: Don't worry about it. I'm wearing a lacy black
bra. My soft breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and
harder.
Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra. I think
it's stuck. Do you have any scissors?
Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly...I'm
reaching back undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air
caresses my breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and
inspecting the clasp.
Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel
your tongue all over me.
Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you
know, breasts. They're neat!
Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm
nibbling your ear.
Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with
spit and phlegm.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.
Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the
remains of my blouse.
Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop
it with a plop.
Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing
you hard tool.
Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold!
Yeeee!
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take of my panties!
Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going
all over, in and out nibbling on you... ummm... wait a minute.
Sweetheart: What's the matter?
Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm
choking!
Sweetheart: Are you OK?
Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit! I'm turning all red.
Sweetheart: Can I help?
Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm
fumbling through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep
your cups?
Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.
Sweetheart: Come back to me lover.
Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.
Sweetheart: I'm on the bed arching for you.
Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the
cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark,
I'm lost. Where's the bedroom?
Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
Wellhung: I found it.
Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want
you so badly.
Wellhung: Me too.
Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately our
naked bodies pressing each other.
Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It
hurts.
Sweetheart: Why don't you take off your glasses?
Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place
the glasses on the night table.
Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across
the room and toward the bathroom.
Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover!
Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling
around for the toilet. I lift the lid.
Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush
handle, but I can't find it. Uh-oh!
Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry
hamper. Sorry again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly
feeling my way.
Sweetheart: Mmmm, yes. Come on.
Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my...you know...thing...in
your... you know...woman's thing.
Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I
kiss your neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I
can't stand it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!
Wellhung: I'm flaccid.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around, an
incredulous look on my face.
Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my wiener
is all floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting
on my underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the
night table. I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of
hair spray, picture frames and your candles.
Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my
shoes.
Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God!
One of our candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm
pointing at it, a shocked look on my face.
Sweetheart: Go to hell! I'm logging off, you loser!
Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh nooooo!
Sweetheart: Bye!!!
 
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