The last fight we had was my fault. My wife
asked, �What�s on the TV?� I said, �Dust!�
In the beginning God created earth and rested. Then God created man
and rested. Then God created woman. Since then neither God nor man
has rested.
My wife and I are inseparable. In fact, last week it took four state
troopers and a dog.
Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mother-in-laws.
Young son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a
man doesn�t know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in
every country, son.
The most effective way to remember your wife�s birthday is to forget
it once.
How do most men define marriage? An expensive way to get laundry
done for free.
If you want your wife to listen and pay undivided attention to every
word you say, talk in your sleep.
Then there was a man who said, �I never knew what real happiness was
until I got married; then it was too late.�
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street
with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they look
beautiful.
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