What common words, phrases and sounds
actually mean, when a woman says them...
Fine: This is the word we use at the end of any argument that
we feel we are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine
to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of
those arguments.
Five minutes: This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the
five minutes that your football game is going to last before you
take out the trash, so it's an even trade.
Nothing: This means something and you should be on your toes.
"Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman
has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards.
"Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last
"Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine".
Go Ahead (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One
that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing"
and will end with the word "Fine".
Go Ahead (normal eyebrows): This means "I give
up" or "do what you want because I don't care". You
will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead" in just a few
minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and
she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she
cools off.
Loud Sigh: This is not actually a word, but is still often a
verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh"
means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she
is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over
"Nothing".
Soft Sighs: Again, not a word, but a verbal statement.
"Soft Sighs" are one of the few things that you can
actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or
breathe and she will stay content.
Oh: This word followed by any statement is trouble. Example;
"Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to so and so
about what you were doing last night." If she says
"Oh" before a statement, RUN, do not walk, to the nearest
exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is
done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to
talk to you for at least 2 days.
Oh (as the lead to a sentence): Usually signifies that
you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or
you will get a raised eyebrows "Go ahead" followed by acts
so unspeakable that we can't bring ourselves to write about them.
That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements
that a woman can say. "That's Okay" means that she wants
to think long and hard before paying you retributions for whatever
it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with
the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised
eyebrow "Go ahead". At some point in the near future when
she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big
trouble.
Please Do: This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman
is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason
you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a
fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a
"That's Okay".
Thanks: A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say
you're welcome.
Thanks a lot: This is much different from "Thanks".
A woman will say, "Thanks a lot" when she is really ticked
off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way,
and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh". Be careful not to
ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh", as she will only
tell you "Nothing".
I hope this clears up any misunderstandings...
 
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