Certificate
of Upgrade
to
Complete Asshole
is awarded to
____________________________________
In recognition of your obnoxious attitude, ability to piss people
off, complete
asinine juvenile behavior and total dedication to personal gain
without regard
to the many hardships you have forced upon friends, family and other
during your
lifetime, you have become a legend in your own mind.
To recognize your upgrade from half-assed to complete asshole, gives
all
concerned great satisfaction. If anyone, for any reason, doubts your
status,
JUST BE YOURSELF!
____________________ |
____________________ |
____________________ |
Effective |
Date |
Signed |


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